A Toastmasters Speech: Burnout, Boundaries & the Energy We Forget to Protect
Let’s start with the addiction we don’t talk about…
Did you know that the need to constantly be busy can actually be a form of addiction?
Some people drown out their pain with alcohol or drugs.
Some shop to get that dopamine hit to feel better.
Others, like me, worked non-stop.
And let me tell you, I was a great employee.
I was always there. I came in early, stayed late, and wore many hats within the business.
If my boss needed me on a plane, I was on it, even if it meant missing whatever plans I may have had in my personal calendar.
And then I started a business.
And that was a whole new level of being able to avoid being alone with my thoughts and facing my trauma.
My business grew quickly. I won awards. I was praised for how much I could handle.
And it felt good.
Because when I was working,
I felt in control.
I was doing what I loved. And I was helping people.
I got my dopamine hits from being useful; solving problems for others, building success for brands, and teaching workshops. I loved the words of affirmation.
Doing things for everyone else but myself became my drug.
And then, it caught up with me.
I had trained people that I was always available, always “on,” always showing up. But inside, I was tired. Drained. Frustrated. And I didn’t know how to say no.
The resentment built. I started shutting people out instead of telling them no, because avoiding felt easier than possibly disappointing them.
Eventually, I realized everything I was feeling was because I was burnt out and hadn’t been taking care of myself. I had been giving away my energy to everyone else for so long.
That was a few years ago; since then, I’ve been in what I call my “No Era.”
Now, even if someone's idea or opportunity excited me, I have ways to give myself space before I give a commitment.
And that’s where the Burnout & Boundaries Workbook came from.
The Burnout Workbook Overview – Awareness, Reflection, Action
At this part of my speech, I started going through the Burnout Workbook (download for free here). I gave each member a copy and asked them to do the Burnout Quiz in Part One.
The first step in understanding where you are in the burnout journey is awareness. The quiz, Part One, is designed to help you spot the early signs —mentally, physically, and behaviorally, so you can catch burnout before it escalates.
Once we’re aware and we’ve acknowledged where we are, the next step is reflection.
That’s where we ask:
Who or what is currently draining me?
What am I doing out of guilt or obligation?
What used to bring me joy, but now feels like a chore?
From there, we move into action, this means taking small, gradual steps to reclaim our time and energy.
Because it’s not about overhauling your life overnight - it’s about making sustainable changes that restore you, piece by piece.
I now call myself a Recovering “Yes” Person & Overachiever
For most of my life, I was a “yes” person.
If someone asked for my help, I’d say “yes,” no matter how full my plate was. I wore it like a badge of honour.
Now, I call myself a recovering overachiever.
Here’s the truth: saying no isn’t selfish. It’s a necessity for the long term.
If you’re feeling strained, drained, resentful, and frustrated on the inside, it’s only a matter of time before it starts showing up on the outside.
I will be honest, saying no and disappointing people will not always feel good in the moment.
But here’s what does feel good: waking up the next day without that pit of resentment in your stomach because you said yes to something you didn’t have the capacity for.
Saying no is about protecting your energy so that when you do say yes, you can show up fully and without resentment.
This is where building an Energy Investment Strategy comes in…
It’s kind of crazy when you think about how…
- We plan how we spend our money.
- We schedule how we spend our time.
- But most of us never make a plan for how we spend our energy.
Yet our energy is one of our most valuable resources!
When we have it, we can do the things we love, spend time with the people we care about, and actually be present.
When we don’t have energy, everything feels heavier, harder, and less enjoyable.
An Energy Investment Strategy is like a personal budget for your energy. It helps you:
Get clear on what fuels you and what drains you.
Protect your energy from things that pull you off course.
Invest it where it creates the most alignment and impact in your life.
On the final pages of the workbook, I share a few strategies I used to create space for myself before saying yes or no to an ask or opportunity.
One of the biggest tactics I use is this:
“Let me check my calendar and look at my week. I’ll get back to you tomorrow.”
This does two things:
It lets the other person feel like I am truly taking some time to consider their request.
But most of all, it gives me time to sleep on it and ask myself:
Do I truly want to do this?
Do I actually have time for it?
For me, that one-night pause almost always brings clarity - it’s either a yes I’m excited about, or it’s a no that protects my well-being.
Conclusion
You don’t have to wait until you’re completely burned out to start protecting your energy.
Start small. Notice the signs. Reflect on what’s draining you. Take back your time, piece by piece.
And the truth is, the right people will still love you when you honour and respect yourself. And you’ll love yourself more, too.
The Burnout Workbook is a completely FREE DOWNLOAD HERE.
